101 Dralasite Gag Gifts

jedion357's picture
November 30, 2011 - 6:45am
I need to populate market stalls in the Forum of Psychsorium with products and the first thing that came to mind was gag gifts of the whoopie cushion kind.
RE Document page:  http://www.starfrontiers.us/node/5973
and discussion page: http://www.starfrontiers.us/node/5929

I can easily imagine young buds experiementing with pocketing air and letting it out in controlled manners to produce all sorts of sounds and squeeks. Then imagine the first time a dralasite heard a human fart and observed the reaction of other humans to that occurance. Suddenly, fart noises would be in, in a big way. If they had never invented a whoopie cushion themselves because they are a walking whoopie cushion they would have loved the invention when they discovered it on a human world.

Anyway I expect all the classic gags to be popular and a few new ones that the inventive minds on this site will come up with.

Please suggest a credit price for the item too.
I might not be a dralasite, vrusk or yazirian but I do play one in Star Frontiers!

jedion357's picture
November 30, 2011 - 7:00am
whoopie cushion- 1 Cr

Hand shocker- 5 Cr. Comes as a ring (for most races) or as a disc with an adhesive pad for dralasites (wise man once said never shake the pod of a dralasite wearing a ring). Device contains a non rechargable micro power cell and is good for 10 mild shocks.

Arrow through the head gag 2 Cr. Note dralasites never invented bows and arrows in their past but that has not stopped this gag from being popular once they encountered human society. Note if you closely check a high resolution version the picture used as the cover for the Core Four project the dralasite in the picture has this gag tucked into his belt.

Fake Glasses with a human nose and mustache: 1 Cr. Popular where they interact with humans.

Credit Voucher with molecular bonding adhesive. 4 Cr. The old credit voucher glued to the floor trick. New and improved with MBA (molecular bonding adhesive) the credit voucher becomes fused to a surface at the molecular level. A laser scalpel will remove (destroy) the credit voucher but the molecular adhesive remains to be worn off over time.
I might not be a dralasite, vrusk or yazirian but I do play one in Star Frontiers!

jedion357's picture
November 30, 2011 - 7:12am
The Portal Rain Maker: 25 Cr, 1kg
Marketed by Groth Gags Limited
The portal rain maker is a modern and high tech upgrade of the bucket over the door gag. This device comes with a wall mount bracket and optional Molecular Bonding adhesive mount. It has a motion sensor and can be set to spray a small amount of water on a being passing through the portal beneath it. It also has setting to skip a certain number of being passing through the door between sprays. Holds enough water for 20 sprays. Operates on a SEU microdisk which must be replaces with every water refill.

Note: I would allow a technician PC to kit bash this and repurpose its motion sensor, there is only a small chip that activates the device when the correct imput is given it from the motion sensor and the bulk of the device is actually mechanically based not electronic so there would be limits to what a technician PC could do with it.
I might not be a dralasite, vrusk or yazirian but I do play one in Star Frontiers!

rattraveller's picture
December 22, 2011 - 10:03am
OK gang at my count there are six gag gifts on this lift. The title is 101 so let's get cracking. If you can't think of one just list what you seny your uncle who doesn't visit because of his little problem.

For my contribution we have a theme with a twist for each race.

As everyone knows some Dralasites like to dye themselves carefully choosing colors which express how they feel and are the latest style. Of course the gag here is that once the joke color dye is exposed to sunlight it changes color to something else. Red to Pastel Purple, Blue to Neon Lime Green, Yellow to Flourescent Orange so on and so forth.

Now enterprising joke sellers have expanded this;
Humans---clear sunblock changes to pretty colors
Vrusk---Shiny shell wax changes to pretty colors
Yazirian---Conditioner whole body conditioner which changes to pretty colors

OK that adds four only 91 to go.
Sounds like a great job but where did you say we had to go?

jedion357's picture
December 22, 2011 - 2:46pm
Gag toothpaste, turns your mouth black and or funny colors, for humans and yazirians.
I might not be a dralasite, vrusk or yazirian but I do play one in Star Frontiers!

Inigo Montoya's picture
Inigo Montoya
December 22, 2011 - 6:02pm
Yazirian itching powder. A light dusting while your former yazirian friend is sleeping, or dust inside his clothes (or vac suit) before he dresses will have him itching and scratching like a flee ridden mut.

Hillbilly teeth for dralasites. Imagine the shock when a dralasite walks into a room, cracks a smile and actually has teeth; let alone crooked yellow teeth with plenty of black cavities.

jedion357's picture
December 22, 2011 - 7:20pm
I'm suddenly reminded of pranks from college- one, not my own, was plastic wrapping a toilet or toilet seat with clear kitchen grade food wrap. Theory was that in a dark bathroom some in a hurry would splatter pee on his legs or go to sit and get a surprise. I felt that there were too many failure points- like someone just being observant and spotting the prank and then feeling like they're smarter then the prankster. For my self it goes against my code to let a mark feel like he got the better of me, if I'm going to prank you, you'll never see it coming. But I bet dralasite will find great humor in installing a device into a urinal that senses pee and squirts back water as long as urine is being squirted in its direction. Trade name for this device is the urinal fountain.
I might not be a dralasite, vrusk or yazirian but I do play one in Star Frontiers!

jedion357's picture
December 22, 2011 - 7:41pm
The Silent But Deadly Woopie Bomb: small gas filled device programed to release its payload by audio command, usually a cough, device can be set for a time delay so that there is no connection between the audio command and silent release of noxious gas. Needless to say you should always check under your chair when invited to a dralasite dinner party. And perhaps under the chairs to either side of you. Diplomatic functions held by a dralasite ambassador have developed a curious practice: chairs are placed upside down on the table at the place settings to show the bottom of the chair to the guest who will turn it right side up and set it on the floor before sitting. This in turn lead to buffets becoming common at such dralasite hosted diplomatic functions since the plate can't be set at the place setting with the chair there.
I might not be a dralasite, vrusk or yazirian but I do play one in Star Frontiers!

iggy's picture
December 22, 2011 - 10:56pm
Vrusk sugar crystal candy with a gooey center.  The Vrusk gets it's mandibles gummed up in the gooey sweet gel after biting through the crystallized cover.

Inigo Montoya's picture
Inigo Montoya
December 23, 2011 - 4:43pm
Most of my college pranks won't convert to SF. The one I want to share now isn't brilliant or original, but it was quick and easy allowing for spontaneity. We would use pennies to wedge dorm room doors shut. Surely a dral techie could come up with a magnetized device to place near or on a door to prevent the automatic opening device/sensosr to operate properly. 

You used to be able to buy a type of fireworks that would attach to a spark plug wire or the distributor cap of an automobile. It would let out a shrieking sound, smoke and a bang when the driver turned the ignition. Something with smoke, sparks and shrill sounds would be funny coming from somebodies vehicle, space ship console, or computer keyboard.

How about the classic pistol that shoots out the flag that says BANG!. Work that into somebodies auto pistol. Or a Laser weapon that shoot out a flag that says ZAP! Of course, it would be just as funny if their real feeling laser pistol/rifle just had the flashing lights and annoying noise like the ones you can buy today.

Fake grenades, I am sure would be fun. As the team is gearing up in their assault scout, the dral straps on his belt of grenades when the crew hears that "twang" followed by the thump and rolling sound of a grenade that just popped off and armed itself.

A small (coin sized) rubber disk (that blends in to the shoe) that you place on the bottom of a shoe, causing that annoying squeak every time a step is taken. Alternately, a sprayed on substance would be better.

Instead of disappearing ink, how about disappearing tangler?

Have we already covered fake barf and poop? What are the ramifications of a SF'ish M80 flushed down the waste processing unit?

A few years ago Internet videos where a screaming zombie suddenly popped up were rampant. I could see dral computer techs implanting these to scare their comrades during those long shifts of sifting through mounds of data or real time events.